Trouble Sleeping

Hello Compassionate's, How are you? I hope you are well.

Lately I have had trouble sleeping, my mind races, I worry about the repairs to my moms place as just getting a quote seems to have a high price tag, it seems everyday after doing and being given the run around my mom and step dad don't seem any closer to getting back home, a delay in Canada post getting the money order to the inspector was sent the wrong way and added 10 days to the wait of getting any work started on fixing the house, biggest lesson I have learned Insurance, a friend did some digging and said she found a company that can cover low or fixed income people at a $180.00 a year, so when I get the details I am sharing it with my mom and I will sign up and share the details with you.

A insurance agent would make all the calls, it would be less stressful, less tring, I can tell it is taking so much out of my children's grandparents to do so much running around and feel like they are getting no where and then deal with the chaos of their grandkids that don't always use a inside voice or listen, an agent could have done the phone calls filled out paper work and made sure it was a little less stressful.

 Add the desire to help, the making of the bracelet's and lack of sales and you get a daughter that has trouble sleeping, I don't have a lot of money that I can just give them, my twindom turned 2 Aug 12th and needs to upgrade from crib to toddler beds, my 4 year old son needs to upgrade to size 5 clothes and is hard on shoes, we already got our oldest near gear, did her back to school before camp, wow is she blessed, I won her a spot at Joy Bible Camp and with her grade 5 teachers help of filling out a scholarship form she had a 2 week drama day camp, thank goodness for small and beautiful mercy's, we couldn't have afforded to give it to her, but people know what we do for the community and the countless volunteer hours invested in making this part of the world a little nicer, greener, safer so our children can enjoy it together and wait until adults to know what fear feels like.

I don't know when I turned into a worry wart so to say, I think it's one part adult, two parts parenting and a pinch of the ever changing world we live in, Mix together with time and you get a worry wart with trouble sleeping, wait did I say that already? 

Ok Coffee is here, me thinks good to go I am...sip...ah ( are you laughing yet?) 

Deep breath, smile on face as my 4 mini me's have a quite beautiful moment together and sweetness feels are unit, ah these moments are precious, priceless and worth everything, have you had one those? That feeling of peace knowing just by looking and feeling in the moment that even with the chaos they are ok and will be, showing that compassion with each other, sharing, it's like for a minute, I think about how sad it is the world they know is different from us growing up, but...what's that word I am looking for I feel filled with Hope, maybe a touch of pride that I did something right in raising them. ( I feel like some of you are nodding your head's with a amen to that, type of thing)

With all the bad news around us of the fight to protect elephants just being undone, going backwards in our sustainable enegry and what feels like a war coming, yes I paid attention in history class and the signs leading up to ww1 and 2 are there.

I don't want to be a bummer, but what is wrong with us, blow up a bus with children? hunting for sport not food? hurting each other with mass violence? Why? What is really gained in all of this?

We made mother earth sick, over fished, polluted the waters that made it hard on new born ocha whales to live more then a few hours, yes I followed that news of a mother killer whale keeping her dead calf a float with help from her pod for 17 days, mamma whale I feel you and heard your message loud and clear.

We do what we can, we can work together for our world to heal, we can work together towards true world peace.

I believe.....Do you?

I know one day the money part of my business will pay off, my family will live comfortably and we will create a bigger impact in our community with the causes we raise money for, in the mean time I write these blogs from the heart with the power to reach and inspire and encourage you the reader, one reader at a time that in the chaos of life, even our trouble sleeping, our little piece of the puzzle helps with the big picture of a better world we envision, each alley clean up, each park make over or each child raised with compassion and community spirit of true inclusion, we do make a difference every day.

Some days the biggest impact we make is to ourselves, our own mind set, evolving our belief's, letting ourselves be ok with I made it though a day, something so simple like picking up one bag of garbage when walking the dog can be a success, learning to be as proud of the small things in life and not just the big rewards, can lead to more happiness with what we have and relieve the stress of what we want.

 So Compassionate's I hope you could make some sense of this blog from a tried mom, I hope I will sleep well tonight and that you will too, happy with your #DailyActsofKindness, #SelfCompassion, #SelfCare, rest well knowing every little bit helps, Be kind, be blessed, stay safe and peace be with you.

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